There’s a pretty typical Twitter new user cycle that I have noticed for people who are just signing up for Twitter. Yes list is most definitely also based on my Twitter history. Between this and Facebook, who needs real friends?
In a mostly particular order, here’s the thought process as you go through signing up for Twitter:
- Talk mad shit about Twitter. “Why the hell do I want to use Twitter? Who cares if Johnny Emokid is eating a bowl of Cheerios? Twitter sucks.”
- Get convinced by either a nerd, celebrity, or news outlet to give it a try.
- Your first Tweet is “Why am I on this … Stupid”, or something along those lines. My first tweet? “already regretting being on twitter 11:25 AM Oct 23rd, 2008 from web”. Sounds about right. Notice the lack of capitalization, cool to the max!
- Start following your couple friends that are on and start to get angry with a few useless I’m eating Cheerios tweets.
- Start to follow celebs and other randoms like THE REAL SHAQ, aka the worst speller in history. A sample Shaq tweet - “I wnt but I dnt drink” … WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? As you can now see, spelling and grammar is an antiquated thing of the past.
- Wonder why people care so much about their follower count.
- Get slightly tee’d when you follow / @ someone and they don’t follow back / reply.
- Download a desktop Twitter app like Twhirl or Tweetdeck.
- Download a cell app like Twitterberry.
- Almost wreck while tweeting about nothing, then tweet about almost wrecking while tweeting about nothing (recycled blog jokes for the win).
- Find useful people to follow who actually tweet helpful / interesting / time wasting links and happenings (They exist! I’m not one of them).
- Begin to enjoy Twitter (Boring).
- Become hopelessly addicted to Twitter like you already are to Facebook.
- Realize MySpace sucks and finally delete your account for good.
- Blog about Twitter and Facebook because you really are hopeless.
I think that about covers it.
@peterahall this guy thinks that lists and blogging about Twitter and Facebook is cool. It’s not. Boom roasted.
